by Laurie Sudbrink on March 20th, 2018

How to Prevent Ego from Interfering with Your Truth | Laurie Sudbrink #leadingwithGRIT #truth #workplacecommunication

​The ego, simply put, is our expressed self.

Our expressed self may not always be aligned with our true self, or our Truth as we refer to it in the GRIT® model. Sometimes our ego may feel an unnecessary need to protect us, and that’s typically when our ego gets in the way.

How do you know when your ego interferes with your Truth? Here are a few signs that could mean your ego is in the way:
  • Do you constantly compare yourself to others, rather than focus on being the best “you” and being happy?
  • If someone else is getting attention, do you redirect the attention to yourself? (I was recently sharing about my grandson and the person I was talking to actually said how good he was at the same task. It took me off guard at first, but then I realized, he was redirecting the attention to himself.)
  • Are you frequently on the defense, feeling like you’ve got to protect and defend your ideas, your reasoning, your decisions, maybe even your life?
  • Do you find yourself making sure everyone knows how funny you are, how smart you are, how cool you are, or bragging about your inventions, accomplishments, ideas, friends?
  • Do you secretly think you’re smarter and can control the situation, perhaps you’re a master at manipulating the scene?
  • Does it seem like others don’t recognize your value enough, so you have to speak up and even demand the recognition and appreciation, maybe to the point where you feel like you have to in most areas of your life?
  • Do you feel jealous and envious when other people succeed, rather than inspired and happy for them?
  • Do you think of everyone else when you read these and you haven’t considered that you might be guilty of one or two of these at times?
Our ego has an interesting impact on our perception of our truth, causing us sometimes to feel too self-assured. For example, you might think you already know something, you attach to that, and then it’s very difficult to remain open to other possibilities. This has been a tough one for me, and the stubbornness of holding on didn’t serve me well in the past.

Our ego can also cause us to not feel assured enough. In this case, you might keep second-guessing yourself, or maybe you over-protect yourself. I remember feeling this way when I was a young female on an all-male more senior team. During casual conversation, if my peer said I was wrong with a fact, whether it was song lyrics or some other trivia, I would second guess myself and think maybe I didn't know. I would too easily back away from it, saying “maybe I’m not right on that” rather than say something like “I’m fairly certain, let’s check it.”  

Ego can end up disguised as disrespect or some other counterproductive behavior. Most people don’t even realize when their ego kicks in to defend them, and people on the receiving end usually perceive it as mean-hearted, condescending, self-centered, and, yes, egotistical!

Similar to what motivates people to lie, the ego is being manipulated by that same four-letter F-word—fear! These fears can put the ego in overdrive. Our expressed self can be miles apart from our Truth.

Emotions can trigger awareness, giving us the opportunity to explore what’s driving our actions. Fear is useful, and we shouldn’t deny or ignore it. We can put fear in its place—respect it—and be thankful for the awareness.

​We can tell our ego to relax - we don’t need you right now. Then we can focus on more productive behaviors.

If we acknowledge our ego is there and admit what it might be doing, we can prevent it from getting in the way of our truth.

Join us April 3 at 2pm EST for The Powerful Truth of Leadership - GRIT® Series Part 1. Register here!
​He who is in the thickest fog blows his own horn. —Anonymous


by Laurie Sudbrink on March 13th, 2018

How to Discover the Origin of Your Truth | Laurie Sudbrink #leadingwithGRIT #truth #leadershipdevelopment
​You can probably remember when you were young, you were constantly told what you should and shouldn’t believe by your parents, teachers, and other role models. Most of us didn’t question it, and if we did, we were probably quickly put in our place, or given an answer that wasn’t arguable.

​So we adopted other people’s thoughts and beliefs and that became our truth.

​We were like little tape recorders, and a lot of those messages we received while growing up stuck with us. Those messages shaped our thoughts and beliefs and our behavior.

When I was growing up, I heard things like “You’ve got to work really hard to make a good living” and “All people who are rich are greedy.” Some of these things continued to be voices in my head for a very long time - and some remnants still exist!

It can be pretty comical when you start to listen to the voices in your own head. I think some of mine were certifiably crazy! Why would we say those things to ourselves? Well, we most likely attached to it subconsciously, storing it on our tape recorder—usually without even thinking about it. You may have seen it in children who imitate mom and dad with their words, behaviors, and even emotions.

​These thoughts and beliefs can become deeply rooted emotionally, playing out later in our lives.

​Years ago, I volunteered to help teach entrepreneurial skills for an inner-city youth program. It took awhile for the students to warm up to me, but once they did, they openly shared their passions and their talents. I had so much fun learning about each one of them!

We started talking about turning some of those passions into goals, creating a better life for ourselves. I learned so much in that conversation with these kids.

​I had always assumed that given a chance, a person would want to do better.

Obviously there would be some lack of confidence and maybe a little disbelief to deal with, but I always thought it was a no brainer, of course they’d jump on the chance to do better. I learned just how deep emotions can affect us.

My students confessed that if they left and created a better life, it would be like dissing their families. One boy said he was sure his older brother would think he didn’t love him if he left.  

These students had watched other family members leave, either never to return, or at odds if they did. They were talked about as if they were selfish and thought they were better than everyone else. To stay connected, to feel loved, these kids felt they couldn’t leave and become someone else.

Over the next few weeks, I worked with the students to question our thoughts and beliefs. And we talked about awareness, love, and choices. They agreed that maybe they could do it differently than the others before them. Maybe there was a way to be true to themselves and stay connected with the families they loved.

We all need to question our beliefs and realize where they came from. Ask yourself, does that thought serve me in a positive way? Is there something emotional attaching me to that belief? We need to keep challenging our thoughts and beliefs to discover and remain true to ourselves.

Our self-esteem, patience, confidence and courage are in direct correlation with our truth, and those same attributes are paramount to leadership. When we know and accept our truth, we will set the example with a perfect mix of confidence and humility.  We will see things more objectively and our intent will be to help the people on our team, rather than be irritated and angered.

Think of how freeing it is when you realize those were not your original thoughts or beliefs or emotions. Nor do they define you. You get to choose. That’s when you can begin to find your own Truth. That’s when you can rebel and disrupt and find who you really are!

Over the next few months, we’ll be featuring each component of the GRIT® model: Generosity, Respect, Integrity and Truth in a series of free webinars. Because it all starts with our Truth, that’s where we’ll begin too!

Join us
April 3 at 2pm EST for The Powerful Truth of Leadership - GRIT Series Part 1. Register here!

Stay tuned next week to learn how to prevent your ego from interfering with your truth!  
Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who you should be?
—Danielle LaPorte


by Laurie Sudbrink on March 6th, 2018

Working with managers and executives throughout the years and in my own personal experiences, the one thing I’ve noticed that we all have control over, is the one thing that we seem to mess up the most.

We all have this tool that would make our life so much easier and produce much better quality, but we don’t ever learn to use that tool properly so we end up misusing and abusing it, or avoiding it altogether.

​The tool we all possess is our communication, and there’s a formula that helps make our communication authentic and more useful. 

Whether it’s having critical conversations, or telling someone you care about them - communicating with GRIT® will make a profound difference.

GRIT® stands for generosity, respect, integrity and truth. When we communicate with GRIT®, we’re communicating authentically, with courage and with good intent. We respect others, and we want to give, whether it’s feedback to help the person learn and grow, or appreciation to help them stay aligned and on track. The only way to give authentically - to create true generosity - is to begin with your own truth.

​Communicating with GRIT® starts inside, with Truth.

How we feel about ourselves and the world around us influences the way we communicate. If our ego is trying to protect us, we won’t be authentic. If we’re fearful, we’ll hold back on what we need to say, or lash out with harsh words. If we’re not clear with what is important to us (our Truth), we won’t be mindful of the quality of our conversations.

Join us today at 2pm to discover How to Communicate with GRIT® and learn:
  • How our thoughts and beliefs influence our emotions, words and actions, and how to make a shift
  • Habits we’ve picked up and what it takes to change them
  • Staying true to who you are and not letting people and situations push your buttons
  • Staying focused on generosity in a way that fuels you rather than drains you
*Free Work of Leaders® Assessment when you attend the LIVE Webinar!*

​​The Work of Leaders tool encourages leaders to understand their own leadership behaviors and how they impact their effectiveness. The tool draws upon over 30 years of leadership research and provides leaders with an opportunity to discover their natural leadership strengths and areas that might need more attention.
I hope you’ll join me! Register here.


by Laurie Sudbrink on February 28th, 2018

Ho Great Leaders Get the Elephant Out of the Room | Laurie Sudbrink #leadingwithGRIT #communication #workplaceculture
​What’s big and heavy and gray and no one’s talking about it?

You guessed it! It’s the elephant in the room!

​It’s almost comical how we dance around it, while it’s right there, getting heavier and heavier, taking up more valuable space.

It’s your 35-year old unemployed nephew who still lives with his parents. It’s our employees not meeting expectations because they know you won’t hold them accountable. It’s the boss belittling people through sarcasm while passing it off as a joke.

The obvious but uncomfortable things no one wants to talk about.

Why not? B ecause we feel that if we bring it up, it makes it more real. If we acknowledge it, then we’ll have to deal with it.  We have to face the conflict, or make the change, or deal with the wrath.

But if the leader avoids the uncomfortable topics, it’s setting the precedent for the entire team to follow suit.

When people avoid real issues, the damage continues, and it affects both parties. Your nephew has a lead on a job, but never makes the effort to apply. Employees slack, becoming disengaged. Other employees get frustrated at the disengagement they see, and then start to do the same. Trust erodes. Meetings become a big waste of everyone’s time.

​We’ve got to have the courage to name the elephant and take meaningful steps to get rid of it.

Here are 5 tips for how to handle the elephants in the room:
  1. First, make sure it’s an elephant! Don’t just assume the issue is well known and avoided by all. Do a little homework first.
  2. Bring it up in a safe and objective way. Be honest about the way you see it, yet open to the way others might see it. Talk about why it’s important to change it.
  3. Invite people to weigh in. Facilitate the discussion. Make sure everyone gets a chance to talk and be heard.
  4. Collectively brainstorm solutions, a plan of action, and a method to check in on the progress.
  5. Close the meeting by letting people know the value of open discussions and that some topics will feel uncomfortable. That’s natural. But, we as a team are not going to let elephants hang out here! Help the team see how damaging the elephants can be through your own professional and personal examples.
When we communicate with GRIT (generosity, respect, integrity and truth), we’ll meet the elephants head on.

Join me for my next free live webinar on Wednesday, March 7 at 2:00 PM EST where I’ll cover How to Communicate with GRIT! 30 minutes of value and fun - Register here!


by Laurie Sudbrink on February 20th, 2018

The Perfect Solution to Stop People from Pushing Your Buttons | Laurie Sudbrink #leadingwithGRIT #leadershipdevelopment #communication
We promised to get back to you this week on something mentioned in last week’s blog.

We said if you are friendly and express love and gratitude, you’ll most likely receive the same.
(It was in the context of karma.)

​But what happens when you don’t get that friendliness returned to you? 

Your friendliness, love and gratitude certainly won’t guarantee that people will always respond in kind.

Just think about it. If someone’s having a really crappy day, your one act of kindness may not snap them out of it. And think a little deeper about this - their crappy response is not about you.

But it’s hard, right, when you’re in the moment… when someone lashes out at you, or responds with a sly remark, or cuts you down with sarcasm. Our initial primal reaction is fight or flight because we think we have to protect ourselves. The best way to protect ourselves is to stay true to ourselves, be confident and caring.

If we let that person’s response bother us, and if we react to something that someone has done to us by doing the same thing to them, we’re not aligning to our Truth. (The cornerstone of the GRIT® model.)

We’re allowing someone to push our buttons and then we respond in a way we may regret, not showing respect for ourselves or for others. With GRIT (generosity, respect, integrity and truth), authentic generosity and respect come from integrity and truth. We’re out of Integrity when we lash out.

If we’re pretty solid with who we are and we are mindful, we’ll realize that that person’s actions really are not about us.

​We have complete control over how other people’s actions affect us!

We don’t have to put up with being treated poorly. When we remain true to ourselves and control the way we want to react, it allows us to react tactfully and objectively. We can calmly respond or maybe we choose to ignore it and let it go.

​The point is, you choose the action based on your integrity and respect - not based on letting someone push your buttons.

For more on not taking things personally, I highly recommend The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. In Leading With GRIT, I cover this topic as well, from a practical personal and workplace perspective.

In our next webinar, we’re discussing How to Communicate With GRIT®! And, just for attending, you'll receive a Work of Leaders DiSC® assessment! It’s a $107.50 value and we’re only giving it to the people who join us LIVE. Identify your strengths and opportunities in 18 leadership best practices! Register here for the LIVE webinar on March 7th, from 2:00 - 2:30 EST!



by Laurie Sudbrink on February 14th, 2018

Did You Know Your Words Are Like a Boomerang? #LaurieSudbrink #LeadingwithGRIT #communicatingwithGRIT
​My grandson was asking me about how to throw a boomerang. He was worried that it would smack him in the face! As I chuckled over that and we researched it (because I’ve never thrown a boomerang), we found a good article about how conditions will always be different, there’s no perfect way to throw a boomerang, and you need to adapt and adjust for the varying conditions.

​Then it occurred to me - our words can be like a boomerang.

What are you creating with your words? 

Don Miguel Ruiz of The Four Agreements said “Your word is your power to create.” Often we don’t realize what we’re saying and what it is causing. Being a good communicator means we’re being mindful of how we’re using our words and the impact it has on ourselves and others.
It’s like karma. What you throw out there will come back to you, and can certainly smack you in the face! If you lash out with negativity, you’ll get negativity in return. If you are friendly and express love and gratitude, you’ll most likely receive the same. (We’ll talk about what happens when you don’t get that friendliness back in next week’s blog post!)

It may not come back directly, just like when you throw a boomerang if you don’t have the skill and precision yet. But it will have an effect on others, which in turn can work it’s way back.

How we speak as parents is a perfect example of the boomerang effect. The way we talk and the words we use with our children affects their behavior. And the same applies in the workplace. When we’re frustrated or flustered and we project that onto our team, we’re showing them that they can do the same. When you lead an organization, think of the trickle-down effect that can happen!

Think about some of the words we might use as parents that could cause damage. Absolutes are typically damaging words:
  • You’re always complaining.
  • You never listen to me.
  • You’re always late.
  • You never do it right.
In effect, you’re labeling that person. When we use absolutes, it leaves no room for any other possibilities. Most people will have a negative reaction to this. Sometimes directly, and you’ll be aware of the reaction. But often indirectly, without you knowing the effect it has had, eroding the person’s self-esteem, inspiring them to be defiant, sneaky, argumentative or even passive and non-committal.

A good rule of thumb is to try and avoid absolutes. Of course, there can be exceptions to any rule, such as using absolutes with positives, like telling you’re children “I’ll always love you,”  or telling your direct-report that everyone makes mistakes.

​Like a boomerang, we need to adjust and adapt and be mindful of the way we are communicating.

​In the case of our children, it is influencing the adults they become. In the case of our teams, it is impacting our bottom lines. Pay attention to your words. Choose them wisely. Be mindful of what you create, for yourself and for others!

Join us on March 7th, from 2:00 - 2:30 EST, to discover How to Communicate With GRIT®! And, just for attending, you'll receive a Work of Leaders DiSC® assessment! It’s a $107.50 value and we’re only giving it to the people who join us LIVE. Identify your strengths and opportunities in 18 leadership best practices! Register here for the LIVE webinar.



by Laurie Sudbrink on February 6th, 2018

The One Predictor to Your Success and Happiness | Laurie Sudbrink #leadingwithGRIT
While some people find themselves annoyed at the lack of control over TSA, plane delays, and other stresses, it occurred to me last week that I’ve learned to really enjoy traveling in spite of those stresses!

On a flight, I have a chance to allow my mind to wander and reflect. I can be creative without boundaries! I’ve had some of my most creative and productive moments on airplanes, including writing the outline to my book, Leading with GRIT!

It could be the altitude (fly high and think big!), or maybe it’s the way I’ve shifted my thoughts and feelings about traveling. Or it could be the fact that I’m strapped in and forced to do something with my time on a long flight! Whatever the reason is, it has led me to realize the one predictor to your success and happiness…


How much energy do you typically have to do the things you WANT to do?

If you feel abundant energy to do the things you want to do, you have a higher probability of success, whereas if your energy is a bit scarce, you have a lower probability of success. And if your energy is depleted, you’re most likely headed for a crisis. (Oh no!)

​But what impacts our energy? And how can we increase it and focus it, especially with all the interruptions and distractions we have today?

Let’s take a lesson from GRIT® on this one - We have to know and accept our own truth to get started.

We create our own experiences. Every choice we make right now is leading to a consequence later. How we think about our situation, the choice we made, and the consequences is also our choice.

If I think back years ago when I was stressed and not enjoying traveling, it was mostly due to my thoughts about it. It was also about the lack of sleep and attention to my diet, as well as blaming my work and others for my unhappiness. Yet these were all choices I made.

When we have that moment of awareness, are we being objective, realistic and kind to ourselves? Or are we discovering something and then beating ourselves up about it? Or maybe we’re making excuses for it, justifying it, when deep down we really know our actions are not something that will benefit us in the long run, or benefit others. I’m sure I was stuck in blame mode back then!

​Accepting ourselves as we are right now is the key to making the change we desire.  

Have you ever worked extremely hard for a goal in life only to find yourself exhausted, not fulfilled and maybe even resentful? Many of us were taught to work really hard, push yourself, make money, be something… and apparently this was not in alignment with our truth.  If you accept that you made choices that led to this, you can then be free to make choices today to move away from this. Blaming someone or something will only keep you trapped with depleted energy.

​The cool thing is - you can change at any moment.

Life is full of opportunities to make changes. Too often we need something drastic to happen to wake us up and make a change. That’s why you hear from so many motivational speakers who’ve been through crisis. It was what propelled them to make a change and share it with you.

You don’t need something horrific to happen to wake up and lead you to an abundance of energy. There are all kinds of opportunities all day long, just begging you to take them!

As leaders, whether formal or informal, it’s so important to understand this predictor of success. It’s not only your deliberate actions that influence others. Your own energy is attracting or repelling those around you. Think about people in your life and the ones you enjoy being around versus the ones you have to really make an effort with. Often people aren’t even consciously aware of why they’re drawn to you or repelled. It’s a feeling they get. As John Maxwell said “People buy into the leader before they buy into the vision.”  

If you want to create more success and happiness in your life, start with awareness of your energy level. Accept where it is. Self-reflect on one thing you can change to increase your energy this week. Is it better sleep you need, is it your thoughts getting in your way, is it meditation or silence you need more of?

How do you typically find inspiration and creativity? How do you replenish your energy? Where do you find that you can usually focus? Share your thoughts in the comments below!


Laurie Sudbrink #leadingwithGRIT
Resource Library | Laurie Sudbrink #leadingwithGRIT

by Laurie Sudbrink on January 31st, 2018

How to Ensure Your Goals Materialize | Laurie Sudbrink #goalsetting #leadingwithGRIT
​Science says 92% of people make goals but don’t reach them. This can leave people feeling discouraged, frustrated and even defeated. No wonder many people have given up on goal setting altogether!

​Many actually think goal setting is a joke, and it’s become much cooler to not set any New Year’s resolutions at all.

“Life’s too short” has become cliche. But life really is too short if we don’t make the best of it. Are there things you yearn to do? Is there something you want to change about your current situation? Is there something you dream about doing but it doesn’t seem possible?

If you’re content with the way things are, I applaud you! Enjoy that path you’ve made for yourself!

For those of us who want to make a change, read on.

What does it take to make your goals a reality? There is a way to change the cycle and get what you want out of life, and it’s really not that difficult! For many, it will only be a 2-degree shift.

Join us today at 2pm EST for a LIVE webinar on How to NAIL Your Goals - With GRIT to find out what you can do to highly increase your chances of your goals coming true!

Folks who attend can ask Laurie questions LIVE (for free!) and attendees will get a really cool tool to help you get your goals organized and tasked out. Stop struggling with the path to your goals and use this all-encompassing goal sheet to get your GRIT together!

I can’t wait to see you at the webinar. Click here to register!


by Laurie Sudbrink on January 23rd, 2018

​For many of us, it’s not starting a goal that’s difficult. It’s sticking with it that trips us up.

​How many times have you found yourself starting something that you really wanted to do, starting strong and full of motivation, but then completely falling off track?

​​​Whether it’s exercise, eating better, staying positive, stopping smoking, or any other worthwhile goal you’ve set out to accomplish - the desire is there, you’re feeling awesome about it, you’ve even accomplished your activities toward it for a few weeks.

​Then you wake up one day and realize you’ve stopped, or you just can’t resist, or you are so tired you can’t do it today, and that becomes the next day and the next and the new norm.  

This is probably a big reason people avoid goals and New Year’s resolutions - they’ve had bad experiences in the past and it becomes a joke!

Before we can tackle this problem of falling off track, we’ve got to make sure we’re completely aware of our situation, what we really want and why, what obstacles might get in the way, how we might fall off track and what we can do to eliminate as many as we can. See how GRIT can help with this! And guess what, you’re still likely to get off track now and again. So that is one of the realities.

Do you neglect to brush your teeth once in a blue moon, maybe when you’re so exhausted you’ve fallen asleep on the coach and stumbled your way into bed. You don’t give up on brushing your teeth, right? Of course there could be a lot of extrinsic motivation for this one (like not having horrible breath), but hopefully you realize how important it is to your health and wellness and that’s your intrinsic driver. The other thing that makes it a bit easier to get back on track with brushing your teeth is you notice very quickly how gross it feels and you probably can’t stand it.

​Taking complete ownership and responsibility will help you stay on track.

​If we blame someone or something, we become victims and feel powerless. Often we do this without even being aware. I’ve found myself saying I can’t exercise regularly because of my travel schedule. My inner truth knows that’s nonsense! It might be a little more difficult, but when I value the activity I find a way.

How often do we blame other people or things for our situations? This video from Brene Brown on blame and accountability made us chuckle because it’s so spot on! It really made me think about how I can someone blame others for things that are clearly my responsibility.
Some of our goals are a little harder to notice so when we fall off track, we can stay off course longer, and then it’s even harder to get back on. Be aware of your potential obstacles. Plan for them. If there’s no way around them, for example when I travel I can’t do my daily walk on the beach, then plan an alternate and schedule yourself when you get back home. For me, it works best while I’m home and in the habit to schedule this in my calendar for when I return. I remind myself how good I’ll feel rather than just telling myself to do it. My calendar appt to “walk on the beach” says “Soothe with the sun on your face and the sand on your feet.”  

How we fall off track:
  • Change in schedule
  • Get sick
  • Don’t schedule it
  • Get sidetracked
  • Get bored
What to do to get back on track:
  • As soon as you’re aware, don't beat yourself up about falling off track. It happens to us all. You can look at why and how with the intent of learning from it and improving but don’t dwell on it.
  • Make a new plan asap. Make it very doable, and not too difficult that you won’t start.
  • Wrap your mind around why it’s important to you. Imagine how you want to feel.
  • Set reminders that focus on the ‘why’ and the feeling so when they pop up, they instantly remind you of the importance, not just the task.
  • Plan ahead, and do your best.
What do you do to get back on track? We’d love you to share what things knock you off course and what strategies you use to get back on track.

In my next webinar, we’re talking about How to NAIL Your Goals - With GRIT. I’ll address the challenges faced when working toward your goals and how you can use the GRIT model to overcome them. We answer questions LIVE in that webinar, so if you’ve got a particular roadblock ahead of you with your goals, hit me with your challenge and we’ll work together to help you overcome it!

Click here to register for the free live webinar, How to NAIL Your Goals - With GRIT on February 1, 2018 at 2pm EST.



by Laurie Sudbrink on January 16th, 2018

Focus, Motivation and Discipline | Laurie Sudbrink #leadingwithGRIT #leadershipdevelopment
​We’re not all naturally self-motivated. And even the people who are self-motivated, are not that way all the time. (Netflix binge, anyone?) So when we’re in that “I just don’t want to!!” slump, we’ve got to think about how we can motivate ourselves - and others - to get the job done.

To stay accountable to your goals, it takes a combination of focus, motivation and disciple. And it’s very important to know yourself.

Know what’s important to you and stay focused on it. Do you have a 5- or 10-year vision? Are you clear on your purpose, your why? Write it down. Keep it close. Affirm it every day by writing it again. Feel the gratitude as if you’re already there. This tricks your brain into sending signals that you are already there, so the actions you take are easier. You’re not resisting the activities that it takes to get there.

Last week we wrote about GRIT and how important it is to know yourself, your strengths, your limitations, your passions, your motivators, your stressors. Are you more social and like to collaborate, or do you prefer to go it alone? DiSC® is a great tool to understand yourself a bit more and will provide you some of that insight that will help you stay focused and motivated.

Here are some of the ways our team finds focus and motivation:
We recommend an Accountabilibuddy! Not the kind coined in Southpark, “the name for a buddy you love so much, that you hold yourself accountable for his well-being.” Almost opposite. Find someone to hold you accountable. Having someone to work with, talk with, and show up for can be a great motivator. Find someone that you trust, someone that will be candid with you and has your best interest at heart.  My best accountability partners have been people who hold me accountable and I do the same for them.

Know where your own motivation comes from. Your motivation comes either from inside of you (intrinsic) or outside of you (extrinsic). For example, if I exercise to feel more energized and happy, that’s intrinsic. If I exercise only to look better, that’s extrinsic. Don’t get me wrong, extrinsic motivation has its value. It’s important to have a bit of both. In my experience, those who are more intrinsically motivated are more likely to stay on course and reach their goals and feel more fulfilled.

This is why it’s important to have a purpose. Intrinsic motivation is very closely tied to your values and your self-worth. Extrinsic motivation doesn’t have to be, and can actually ruin intrinsic motivation at times. You may have heard the story of the man who was irritated by the kids who played in the empty lot next door. He decided to think of a way to get them to not play there. So he paid them to play. He asked them if they’d like $5 each for playing there. They all thought he was crazy, but of course, said yes. So for a few days, he paid them each $5. Then he told them he was really sorry, but he only could pay them $1 each. They grumbled a little but said ok, and still showed up to play. After a few days, the man told them he was very sorry but he couldn’t pay them anymore. The kids were upset and said they didn’t want to play in the stinkin’ lot anymore. Ironically sometimes we can lose sight of our internal motivation due to something external!
And sometimes we’re just not going to feel motivated, right? There are times that we just need some good old-fashioned discipline. Discipline is doing it even when you don’t feel like it. It’s making that tough choice to get up early and exercise rather than caving and going out late with your friends. It’s being accountable to what we really want for ourselves, long term.

If we build habits, it makes it easier to stay disciplined when we just can’t seem to muster up that motivation. The dictionary defines a habit as a settled or regular tendency or practice, especially one that is hard to give up. And it goes on to use it in the context of a bad habit. But think about it. If you take regular and consistent action, your brain and body will be trained and it will be hard to give up.

A good system can keep your goals and activities top of mind. If we write down our long-term vision and we know our purpose, we can look at this to remind ourselves of why we are doing this to begin with. We can consider what habits are going to be important to form, and maybe we’ll need to break some too. Aligning each morning and evening with your calendar, list, spreadsheet and/or task system keeps you on track.

​Know yourself and what works best for you.

In my next webinar, we’re talking about How to NAIL Your Goals - With GRIT. I’ll address the challenges faced when working toward your goals (like that Netflix binge we mentioned) and how you can use the GRIT model to overcome them. We answer questions LIVE in that webinar, so if you’ve got a particular roadblock ahead of you with your goals, hit me with your challenge and we’ll work together to help you overcome it!

Click here to register for the free live webinar, How to NAIL Your Goals - With GRIT on February 1, 2018 at 2pm EST.

#LaurieSudbrink #leadingwithGRIT
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by Laurie Sudbrink on January 9th, 2018

Use GRIT to Make Your Goals Come True  - Laurie Sudbrink on #GRIT and #goalsetting
‘Tis the season for New Year’s Resolutions.  Everyone’s talking about them, but here’s what they’re not talking about - Have you ever set a goal and accomplished it (yay!), but then you immediately felt empty, just not quite satisfied.

I’ve been there.

I would reach a goal, but almost immediately I would feel let down. I came to later understand that my goals weren’t really aligned to me. I was either doing things to please others or trying to show the world what I could do. And I was just moving way too fast to even think about any of it.

​Then - it hit me. I was a hamster on a wheel!

So I took a step back. I thought about what was REALLY important to me. I aligned to that vision and respect I had for myself. And that’s when I was able to reach goals, and feel good about it. And, not coincidentally, that’s when my true gift came out.

I discovered a few things that we tend to do when setting goals that can really backfire:
  • Goals for the sake of goal-setting: First of all, we set a goal that may not be aligned to who we really are and what we really want. Asking yourself why the goal is important to you is a good place to start. You might discover it’s feeding your ego or impressing your friends or family (looking externally for some sort of approval or acceptance).
  • Just going along for the ride:  Secondly, we’re setting ourselves up to not enjoy the journey, to only be happy when we reach the goal. We push push push to reach those goals, yet internally, often without awareness, we resist those very goals we set ourselves! The definition of stress is resisting! We ‘suffer’ through just to reach the goal.
  • #Overboard: Third, we often end up over-doing in one area and then another area suffers.
I’ll give you another personal example from my life. I worked SO HARD to earn magna cum laude in college. I was a non-traditional student, with a full-time job and a child to raise. At the end of each semester, I was sick. I had depleted myself in order to obtain this goal. I’m sure other areas were suffering as well!

​So here’s where GRIT comes in and saves the day. GRIT is about aligning to and respecting yourself so that you can live happily and productively. It is about tenacity and perseverance, courage and passion, and it’s also about knowing and accepting yourself so you can give your gift to the world.

Hold on. Did you give that paragraph the attention it deserves? Let’s back up and re-read that because it’s important! 

​The key point there is: GRIT allows you to give your gift to the world.

You have a gift that you are here to give (probably more than one, but let’s just focus on one for now). Using the GRIT roadmap, in order to be authentically Generous, we need to Respect ourselves and others, and align to ourselves with Integrity. 
Use GRIT to Make Your Goals Come True  - Laurie Sudbrink on #GRIT and #goalsetting
You have a gift that you are here to give (probably more than one, but let’s just focus on one for now). Using the GRIT roadmap, in order to be authentically Generous, we need to Respect ourselves and others, and align to ourselves with Integrity.

The only way to do this is to first know and accept our own Truth, so we start with Truth and work our way back to Generosity:


  • Explore who you are, what makes you happy, why you get up in the morning, what’s most important to you and why.
  • Accept where you are right now. Appreciate your journey, everything you’ve learned along the way.
  • Consider what you’d like to change, how you’d like to feel, what you’d like to give to others that aligns with you?


  • Think about the activities you need to do to realize what you want. We call these High Value Activities. Stay tuned for our webinar this month to learn more about HVAs!
  • To get in the habit of performing these activities, write them down each night before bed and read them each morning. This will train your brain.
  • If you’re stuck, not moving, one of my favorite methods is Mel Robbins 5 Second Rule (and no, it’s not the one about picking up what you dropped on the floor and it’s ok to eat it lol - but it is about taking fast action!). Take a look at how Mel suggests we get out of procrastination mode!  


  • Appreciate yourself. Feel gratitude for the things you have. Even feeling gratitude for the things you desire, your future state, helps you accept these things into your life.
  • Respect what you need to be healthy, creative, productive, loving, and generous. Be mindful of all the areas of your life that need attention.
  • Respect others. There’s an entire planet of us with our own truths!


  • Give yourself what you need.
  • When you align yourself to what’s most important to you, stay true to yourself with integrity and respect, you will naturally give back to others.
  • You’ll feel abundance rather than scarcity. You’ll want to give, rather than feeling like you have to. Generosity becomes effortless and enjoyable.

​With GRIT, goal setting becomes fun and you create a lifestyle around it, rather than a short-term system that you resist.

So... I want to hear from you! In my next webinar, we’re talking about How to NAIL Your Goals - With GRIT. I’ll address the challenges faced when working toward your goals and how you can use the GRIT model to overcome them. We answer questions LIVE in that webinar, so if you’ve got a particular roadblock ahead of you with your goals, hit me with your challenge and we’ll work together to help you overcome it!

Click here to register for the free live webinar, How to NAIL Your Goals - With GRIT on February 1, 2018 at 2pm EST.



by Laurie Sudbrink on December 18th, 2017

What is a leader
​That famous acronym - Together Everyone Achieves More - is not always true, as anyone who’s been a part of a dysfunctional team can attest.

​A team takes energy and commitment to work on the real issues that get in the way of reaching the collective goal.

It requires attention and regular maintenance to function properly.

A leader’s role is critical in ensuring the team is a success, by clearing roadblocks; communicating clearly, directly, and positively; and building trust and a culture of accountability.  In order to do this, the leader has to go first. The leader must set the example of communication, collaboration and accountability.

​Once a leader has established trust with the team through these actions, the team will be ready and willing to receive coaching.

Join us today at 2pm when we share a few tips to help leaders communicate and coach more effectively. We’ll be discussing:
  • How to talk like a leader so your team listens.
  • Is it one or many? How to know when a particular team member needs coaching vs. when an entire team needs coaching.
  • Is it working? How to tell if your coaching is making changes for your team.
  • The one simple shift in your communication that changes everything.

Take 30 minutes out of your day today and learn some leadership skills to foster communication and engagement as well as the one simple shift that changes everything!  Completely free to you - absolutely no catch!

by Laurie Sudbrink on December 12th, 2017

When you see a great team, you probably realize that their chemistry didn’t happen by accident. Just like getting a ship safely to harbor, there are a few things going on behind the scenes that make this possible.
  • It starts with a great leader at the helm. Someone who is intentional about the way they lead and manage will unite the team, keep them aligned, and help them create fantastic results.
  • The right people on the boat. The right skill sets and attitudes are crucial to a well-functioning team. Hiring according to values and attitude, and getting the ship cleaned up might mean moving seats around and/or removing someone that isn’t a good fit.
  • A compelling vision and goal to strive toward, with clarity around roles, responsibilities and individual developmental needs. We’ve all got to be rowing in the same direction.
  • Team rewards in addition to the typical individual rewards. When we only provide individual rewards, it’s difficult for the team to focus on a collective goal.
  • Diversity. Making sure we have a good mix of different perspectives. It’s easy to fall into the trap of hiring people who are just like you. We need to be mindful of the value of diversity and make sure we create a team that is well rounded.
  • Arguments. Yes, you read that right. Good debates, where people don’t hold back when they disagree on things. Behind the scenes of great teams are people who are duking it out for the good of the greater goal.
  • The right environment - open, trusting, positive, and not a lot of unnecessary obstacles.
  • Good values, like generosity, respect, integrity, and truth. (Yep, there’s GRIT(R) behind the scenes of great teams!)
  • Meaningful policies and procedures, that make it easier for people to get their jobs done, not harder.
  • Debriefs to help the team see what went well, what didn’t go so well, and how to change course if necessary.
  • Celebration. Taking the time to appreciate the hard work, getting through the rough waters, and reaching shore!
You can find more leadership tips in Captain Michael Abrashoff’s book It's Your Ship: Management Techniques from the Best Damn Ship in the Navy.  

​What else do you see behind the scenes of great teams?

Does your team have some behind the scenes things going on that are making it run well (or not so well?) Join us next week for our FREE webinar on One Simple Leadership Activity to Transform Your Employees into a Team (Dec 19 at 2pm EST) reserve your seat now!



by Laurie Sudbrink on December 5th, 2017

One of the biggest responsibilities of leadership is to get a group of people to a desired outcome. That involves individuals working together as a team. With the interesting human dynamics that come into play, leading a team can often feel like herding cats.

​It takes very intentional leadership to develop a well-functioning and cohesive team.  Understanding the obstacles will help managers prepare to lead their teams.

These 15 obstacles were gathered over the last 20 years from thousands of people in our classes, and from business owners, executives and all levels of employees who participated in leadership 360s and training needs assessments:
  • A manager who doesn’t know how to empower the team: This manager most likely gets frustrated and does most things herself. Or she may rule with an iron fist, using her position and authority to force people. In most cases, people do not feel empowered either way.
  • Lack of awareness and/or appreciation of various personality styles: When we don’t realize that different styles are valuable to a team, we tend to be annoyed by them rather than use them to the team’s advantage.
  • Not having a unified direction: There needs to be a common goal that people can rally behind. Without it, people will tend to focus on what they think is important, with little if any regard to anything else. This leads to another obstacle - silos and competing priorities.
  • A lack of trust in each other and/or in the team leader: Trust is the foundation to any relationship. Without it, we have hidden agendas, people holding onto information, and wasted time worrying about things rather than talking about them.
  • Fear of making mistakes, being wrong, or being criticized: This shuts people down. They will not be open to sharing or offering ideas and suggestions. They will not want to step up or speak up.  
  • Lack of respect: It’s very hard to get people to trust and commit if there is a lack of respect. John C. Maxwell said this best “People buy into the leader before they buy into the vision.”
  • Not enough clarity on roles, expectations and responsibilities: With ambiguity, people are less likely to commit and follow through. They show up at the next meeting confused with what was supposed to happen and who was supposed to do it.
  • Individuals focused on their own goals at the expense of the group goal: Most of us are conditioned to focus on our individual goals in a silo, without thinking of how it impacts the bigger picture. Teams fall short when this competes with the group goal.
  • Not bonded together as a team: The group didn’t spend enough time forming and bonding as a team. There is a lack of emotional connection.
  • Wrong carrot: Rewards are given for individual achievement rather than group achievement.
  • Not feeling a purpose or connection to the vision of the team: When the vision lacks meaning, or it doesn’t inspire or help people feel connected, people will lack motivation.
  • No structure for accountability: When we don’t have a system or structure for follow through and accountability, people tend to fall short of expectations.
  • No role model for holding people accountable: If the leader doesn’t hold people accountable, then the people on the team are not going to. Ironically, if the leader does hold people accountable in a respectable way, and creates an environment where it is safe for others to do so, the leader will not have to hold people accountable because team members will step into that role.
  • Fear of disagreeing/fear of conflict: When people refrain from disagreeing, good ideas are left behind, creativity and growth opportunities are stifled, and potential errors are ignored causing more problems to occur later.
  • Individual egos and insecurities: We all have them. It can be difficult to be aware and not let our egos and insecurities get in the way of the health of the team.
  • A manager who doesn’t remove the person who is not contributing as a team member: Otherwise known as a wuss, when the manager isn’t willing to take care of things, this demotivates other team members.

​A manager’s job leading a team is no easy task. But it is critical to the success of the organization and can be the most rewarding role for a leader.

Last week, I shared a client story about Bob who inherited a team that needed quite a bit of help. Bob faced quite a few of the obstacles above, so before he could get the team functioning well, he had to identify what to focus on.

Take some time to reflect on your leadership and discover where you might be facing obstacles with your team. Are there any obstacles missing from this list? Please share with us so other people will benefit as well.  

In next week’s blog, we’ll be pulling the curtain back to look at what’s behind the scenes of every great team.

If you haven’t registered for our FREE webinar on One Simple Leadership Activity to Transform Your Employees into a Team (Dec 19 at 2pm EST), reserve your seat now! Grab your lunch and spend 30 minutes investing in you.



by Laurie Sudbrink on November 28th, 2017

​How to Transform Your Employees into a Team - Part I

​When I listened to his voicemail, I could tell Bob was frustrated with his team he had recently inherited. He literally said “I know teams are important, but I’m starting to think it might be a whole lot easier to let them all work alone at home!” Although his tone was facetious, his frustration was easy to decipher.
​​Anyone who has led a team knows that to get people working cohesively, it takes more than a group of people working in the same department. 

But if we don’t really understand and value why we need a team approach, the effort we put into building the team will drain our energy.

Bob had been leading the senior team at Golden Years Senior Living Center for just 3 months. In an assisted living center, teamwork is associated not only with an enjoyable living space for residents, but also with increased safety. Bob was asked to lead this team to increase safety, which had been at an all time low. He was expected to show progress in 6 to 9 months.

When I returned Bob’s call, we chatted a bit about what was happening with members of the team. Then we discussed how critical it is to have individuals bond as a team for the success of his safety initiatives.

Once Bob connected why teams were so critical to this initiative, I could instantly hear the stress leave his voice. He even joked and said, “there really might be something to that TEAM acronym Together Everyone Achieves More!”  

​It takes very intentional leadership to develop a well-functioning and cohesive team. 

 Here are the top 5 reasons why teams are critical:
  1. Better ideas. Teams draw on different minds to tackle the same problem.
  2. More efficient and effective work. A strong team has synergy –they accomplish more than individuals can do alone.
  3. More skill sets to draw from. This can make it easier to delegate, and most people appreciate working with their strengths as much as possible.
  4. Provides a variety of personality styles. Having multiple styles helps accomplish a variety of competing priorities, some of which include ensuring quality and timeliness; engaging in healthy dialogue and being clear and to the point; aiming for something much grander and being realistic and completing the goal.
  5. Creates trust and bonding. When team members bond, they support each other. They don’t hesitate to back each other up. Human beings need connection. A cohesive team can provide camaraderie and enjoyment at work (which in turn enhances productivity).
We have a few tools that can help with teaming.  One is the Five Behaviors of a Cohesive Team based on Patrick Lencioni’s Five Dysfunctions of a Team. Participants learn how they score on the key components of trust, conflict, commitment, accountability, and results.

Another great tool is the Everything DiSC Work of Leaders assessment. Using the framework of Vision, Alignment, and Execution, Work of Leaders encourages leaders to understand their own leadership behaviors and how they impact their team’s effectiveness.

We also invite you to join our next free live webinar on December 19, 2017 at 2pm EST on the One Simple Leadership Activity to Transform Your Employees into a Team where you'll learn to talk like a leader so your team listens, how to know when a particular team member needs coaching vs. when an entire team needs help, and how to tell if your coaching is making changes for your team. PLUS, the one simple shift in your communication that changes everything. We hope you’ll join us!


by Laurie Sudbrink on November 22nd, 2017

​I love Thanksgiving. It’s my favorite holiday. And it’s a great time to remind ourselves of all the things we’re grateful for… family, friends, our good health, delicious food, the abundance of love and laughter we have, the great country we live in… There are many things that we can be grateful for.


Have you thought about being grateful before you even receive any of those things?

You might be wondering how in the world would you do that? How can you be grateful for something that’s not even there? And why would you want to anyway?

Feeling gratitude before you receive what you want allows you to be open to receiving.
When you imagine how you’ll feel once you receive what you desire, and you actually feel gratitude for this future possibility - -  well, you’re kind of tricking your brain. I like to call it positive brain washing.

Your brain receives that information. You begin to change your own thoughts and beliefs toward abundance rather than scarcity. Then you act in ways that will attract what you want into your life.

I’ve seen many people successful in doing this, and I’ve done this many times myself (and yes, I’ve worried and stressed and done the opposite as well - so I know this stuff works!)

It’s actually pretty simple. It’s just a matter of believing in it, and doing it.

Start by imagining the kind of life you want. Maybe it’s more freedom and less stress. Perhaps it’s to have more good friends in your life? For some, it might be to achieve a career or financial goal, or get healthier, or feel happier.

Picture yourself there, smile and feel the gratitude for it.

We talked about this a little in last week’s live webinar in terms of visualizing yourself in the role you aspire to within your organization and how that can help you get there. If you missed it, you can see the replay in my free Resource Library!

Do this every evening before you go to bed, and every morning before you get up. Writing this is even more powerful!

Then start with some attainable goals and tasks to support your belief. For example, if I am focusing on health, I’m picturing myself feeling energized, flexible, and fit, and I’m so grateful for this. Every morning and evening, I’ll write “I am so grateful for being happy and healthy, being flexible and fit, with lots of positive energy.” I’ll feel the gratitude while I’m writing it. Then I’ll begin with some small steps towards it. I’ll stretch before I get out of bed. I’ll add one green drink a day, or something else that’s healthy to my diet. I’ll walk 10,000 steps. (By the way, I change it up to keep it fresh and new, because I get bored doing the same ‘ole thing.)  

Before I started this ‘feeling gratitude before I receive’ routine, it always felt so forced, so difficult to complete the tasks I knew were important to my goals. I resented the healthy food. I groaned about the exercise. I didn’t want to stretch each morning. Now it just flows. There’s not a resistant to it. And when you think about it, it’s pretty logical. We’re training our brains to accept our activities, rather than our brains working against us.

So whatever it is you desire, just think, you can have a much more enjoyable journey getting there if you feel gratitude before you receive!

Happy Thanksgiving!



by Laurie Sudbrink on November 14th, 2017

Moving up in management can seem downright impossible at times. But there are steps you can take to increase your odds!
We’ll be discussing a few things that are really important to climbing that ladder:
  • How to handle the biggest obstacles to moving up in management
  • What core competencies most managers need to develop
  • How to identify the RIGHT developmental steps to take you from middle manager to the c-suite.

​And, there’s one trick that really works well.

​It’s so simple, but it’s not always easy.

Anyone can do it, but most of us don’t.

Join us today and find out what this trick is, why it’s so important, and how you can do it! We’ll also include “How to Convince My Boss to Send me to Training!” for all attendees!



​PS - Check out our free Resource Library, and stop back frequently - we’ll be adding value-packed items on a regular basis!

by Laurie Sudbrink on November 7th, 2017

Leading people isn’t easy, but it can be very rewarding. Having good tools to work with makes it that much easier.  

We are so excited to announce the launch of our Resource Library this week!

During leadership training, when I’m coaching, and in everyday conversations, I love to give people resources. It got me thinking “why not create a library for everyone to access when they want?”  

Please check out our new Resource Library here. Anyone on our lucky list of email subscribers received the top secret password this morning! Don’t see that in your email? Make sure you’re signed up for my weekly emails!

I’ve added a few things to start and will consistently be adding more. Don’t hesitate to let me know what other resources you’d like to see added!


by Laurie Sudbrink on October 30th, 2017

​How do you know if you’re ready to move up in management?

Too often I meet people who think they want to be promoted but they really don’t know what management is all about. They’ve been very successful individual contributors - great work ethic, very skilled at their job, and most of the time they get a lot accomplished. To make more money and/or to get recognition and status, they look to this one path - managing. They think this is the way to have a little more control and autonomy, make more money and to gain more status.

But most have no idea what they’re in for when they sign up to manage a team:
  • Working way longer hours with a lot more stress
  • Constantly dealing with people issues that seem ridiculous
  • They get blamed by upper management for everything
  • They feel forced to stay positive and give recognition to people even when they don’t feel it
  • It’s lonely because they have no one to vent to
  • There is excessive time spent communicating without enough action
These are almost verbatim statements from supervisors, managers and directors I’ve spoken with over the years who were promoted with no formal training or understanding of the role. Most were flattered when offered the position and were excited to get recognized for their hard work. And then reality set in!

​The good news is, it doesn’t have to be this stark. Leadership can be a very rewarding experience. When we’re prepared.

Last week I shared Susan’s story of changing her thoughts and beliefs about taking the time to really connect with her team. This awareness helped her ease right into the behaviors of being present and connected. Similarly, we need to change our thoughts about our management role.

It’s very helpful and inspiring to understand the role and purpose of management. As leaders, we are tasked with moving a group of people to a desired outcome. Along that journey, we need to help people see the big picture, relate and communicate more effectively as a team, lead them through change, build trust, have courageous conversations, help each other stay on track, have their backs, coach and mentor them, contribute to their development and just simply be there for them. When done effectively, a whole lot more gets accomplished through your team than could ever have happened individually. Best of all, along that journey, we have an opportunity to make a difference in people’s lives.

If that sounds inspiring to you, then you’re probably ready to move up in management. And as with any new adventure, it is helpful to have a map to get there. Most of us need to hone skills that we haven’t had to use before. Leadership isn’t something we’re either born with or not. Very very few people lead naturally with no formal training and/or years of learning through trial and error.

If you’re ready to move up in management, to take it to the next level wherever you currently are, join us on Nov 15th at 2pm EST for “The Secret to Moving up in Management.” I’ll talk about how to handle the biggest obstacles to moving up in management, what core competencies most managers need to develop and how to identify the RIGHT developmental steps to take you from middle manager to the C-Suite.  Register here!



by Laurie Sudbrink on October 24th, 2017

​It’s hard enough to change our behaviors, but even when we change them, people often still see us the way we used to be.

​So once we’ve put in the work to change ourselves, how do we let other people know that we’ve changed?

Have you ever tried to change something in your life only to find people reminding you of who you used to be? Take Susan as an example. She and I worked on developing her interpersonal skills so she would more effectively connect with her team.

She changed her behavior almost instantly because she believed that it was important. She began making eye contact, not multitasking while listening, nodding her head, raising her eyebrows, and even sitting on the same side of the table with people for their one on one meetings.

Susan’s manager acknowledged the changes when they did their 2-month review. He was impressed at how fast she did change! But at the 3-month 360 progress review, her peers and direct team reported very little change. We knew we had a perception issue.

I admit, to some degree, I do think that it’s none of my business what other people think of me. But - when we’re trying to change, and we’re dependent on other people’s perceptions in order to be successful, well, that’s just a reality of the situation. So we may need to make it our business and manage those perceptions.

​The good news is you really can influence other people’s perceptions of you. But it takes a little focus and effort.

How can we influence other people’s perceptions?

Before we start focusing on their perceptions, we need to manage our own thoughts and beliefs, as Susan did. Susan believed it was important to connect with her team. The energy we exude based on what we believe and what we are thinking comes through in our actions.

Change your thoughts and beliefs about yourself and watch your actions change and your confidence increase. Susan experienced this first-hand. This is paramount to managing others’ perceptions of us and it has to happen first. Then we can start managing others’ perceptions of us.

A few tips on what you can do to influence perceptions:
  • Remember, this change is happening within you and you’re highly aware of it, but others may not be. We have a lot more information about ourselves than others do, so be a little patient.  
  • Respect the fact that it’s really difficult to not see someone as they used to be. After all, this is the reputation you built. It’s not going to change overnight.
  • We need to make sure we are being transparent about the behaviors we are changing. Be proactive about admitting things. For example, if Susan gets distracted during a meeting, as soon as she realizes it, she will apologize and share that she is working on improving this.
  • Help others to see the new you. Susan could further point out that she used to think she was being productive by multi-tasking but she’s learned she is much more effective when she stays focused, and it’s more respectful to do so.
  • Solicit feedback, and don’t get defensive. If someone points something out to you, consider that feedback a gift. Often we’re not aware when we slip back into old habits. We need others to help us be aware.
  • Don’t correct other people about their perception. It’s their perception. It’s our duty to help change the perception by changing OUR behavior and helping them see the new you.
On Wednesday, November 15 at 2:00 p.m. EST, we will be talking about The Secret to Moving up in Management, and this topic of how other people perceive you is a big part of your career growth. I’ll talk about how to handle the biggest obstacles to moving up in management, what core competencies most managers need to develop and how to identify the RIGHT developmental steps to take you from middle manager to the C-Suite.  Register here!

Are there tips in here in this blog post that you plan to use to help others see the work you’ve put in on your personal development? I’d love to know which ones hit home for you.

Bring Lead with GRIT to Your Organization!
Bring Lead with GRIT to your organization!